Help: a Noun and a Verb

This blog is written by Lee Gale Gruen to help Baby Boomers, seniors, and those soon to retire find joy, excitement, and satisfaction in life after retirement. Her public lecture on this subject is titled, “Reinventing Yourself in Your Retirement.” Her memoir, available by clicking here, is: Adventures with Dad: A Father and Daughter’s Journey Through a Senior Acting Class. Click here for her website:

Now, on to my blog:

BART special seatingI had just exited the airport after flying in from out of town and was waiting for the metro to take me home. When it arrived and the doors opened, I realized I had hit it at rush hour. The car was crammed with humanity—standing room only.  That was fine with me; I liked the idea of remaining upright as I had been sitting on an airplane for two hours.

I positioned myself between a post and the back of a seat, holding on to the former. At the next stop, a boy of about nine years of age walked toward me gesturing to a seat. A woman, obviously his mother, was standing nearby and nodding at me. They had been occupying a place designated for the handicapped, pregnant women, and the elderly. To my consternation, I fell into the last category.  Even so, I am in good physical condition and was quite capable of standing.  However, the young boy looked so eager charged with his important mission that I simply couldn’t tell him I had no need of the proffered prime location. So I thanked him very much, walked over, and took my seat for the elderly.  The boy was beaming and looked at his mother who gave the requisite approval.

Sometimes, even if we don’t need assistance, it is a kind gesture toward the giver to accept an offer of help. People feel good when they assist others, and we can get some good feelings for ourselves by being gracious toward their sacrifice in our behalf—a definite win-win situation.

I think the same applies if we really do need help. What’s the matter with that? Some find it so difficult to request and/or accept assistance.  They feel it demeans them or indicates they are lacking in some way.  They might feel a burden that they must reciprocate. No, you don’t need to give like-for-like. Sometimes, there is no way to repay a good deed done for you. The only payback is to pay it forward and perform a kindness for another.

Offer help generously and don’t be ashamed to accept it either. We all need help from time to time no matter our age or physical condition.  Participate willingly on either side of this caring human interaction and reap the emotional rewards that it bestows.


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Filed under active seniors, Baby boomers, gerontology, health and wellness, healthy aging, longevity, reinvention, retirement, seniors, successful aging, wellness

4 responses to “Help: a Noun and a Verb

  1. Christine Marshall

    Your best blog so far, I think!! Thanks. Christine

  2. I agree, LGG, sometimes the hardest thing is to relax and receive.

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