This blog is written by Lee Gale Gruen to help retirees, those soon to retire, baby boomers, and seniors reinvent themselves in this new stage of their lives called retirement. Her blog, public lecture, and self-help book on senior reinvention are titled: Reinventing Yourself in Your Retirement Years: Find Joy Excitement, and Purpose After You Retire. Her memoir is: Adventures with Dad: A Father and Daughter’s Journey Through a Senior Acting Class. Book synopses follow her blog below. Both books are available at Amazon.com by clicking here and here. Visit her website at: LeeGaleGruen.com
CHITCHAT: I recently performed in an original play, “Voices from the Silenced,” which highlights stories of women who had had abortions prior to 1973 when Roe vs. Wade became the law of the land following a U.S. Supreme Court decision. A documentary has been made about that project, and it can be seen by clicking on this link: https://vimeo.com/824401504?share=copy NOTE: the password is: voices
Now, on to my blog:
I have an unusual first name: Lee Gale. On my birth certificate, it is officially my first and middle name. My father thought it up inspired by similar names of deceased relatives, but my mother never liked the name: Lee. So, for the first year of my life, they just called me “the baby.” They finally realized that wasn’t going to cut it as I aged, so they settled on Lee Gale.
Upon meeting me for the first time, a rare few will ask if I use Lee or Lee Gale. After being told the latter is my preference, they just segue right into it without a problem. Today, I’m addressing the other group: those with a problem.
Many want to call me just Lee, or just Gale. To them, I usually offer a hint: Think of the word “legal,” and then stretch it out a bit. Sometimes that works and sometimes it doesn’t. I’m sure most of you with a “different” name can relate.
Since my name can also be interpreted as a man’s name, I have had strange experiences down through the years. When I stayed at a fancy hotel decades ago, my female companion found a rose on her pillow that night. Mine had a piece of chocolate which I found out later was for male guests. Another strange one from long ago: I showed up for a medical exam required by a sporting event I had enrolled in. I was shown to a cubicle in a row of many, and a curtain was drawn across the front. Shortly, I heard someone calling my name from a distance. The doctor was looking for me on the male’s side. In high school, I was assigned a few times to boys’ gym classes—hmmm, maybe not so bad. And, of course, the way U.S. mail is addressed to me is a whole other story.
The correct spelling of my name is also a hang-up for many. Sometimes it ends up: Legale, or Leegale without a space between the two words. I, also, am often identified as: Lee Gail or Lee Gayle. I recently had an example of the latter. After I was cast in a play, I entered my name on a list of the actors. Within a short time, a pesky “Y” had entered the second word of my first name on another list and then on subsequent missives. Whoever had transposed it from the original had just put their own spin on it. What’s the matter, don’t they think I know how to spell my own name?
Why am I making such a big deal about this? A name is something very personal. It’s a significant part of our identity. When it is mistreated with improper pronunciation or spelling, it is insulting and diminishing. The name botcher just can’t take the time to get it right. In so many of my cases, the wrong spelling was reproduced elsewhere and then many more elsewheres. Undoing that mess is like trying to fix a credit card theft.
I have learned that if I don’t correct such errors immediately, they grow and spread like a cancer. In the case of an acting role, such things as newspaper notices, flyers, playbills, etc. may all end up with the incorrect spelling. Then, if someone wants to find me in order to interview me or offer me other roles, it makes it more difficult for them.
Today, we are all moving so fast that we can’t even spend a moment to get someone’s name right. Maybe it’s not considered important, but it is actually a matter of respect to do so. When you mangle someone’s name, they don’t forget it. If some people find it an irritant to master my name, I just tell them, “You can blame my parents.” My position: if you can learn Beyoncé, you can learn Lee Gale. At least mine doesn’t have an accent mark!
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BOOKS BY: LEE GALE GRUEN
Reinventing Yourself in Your Retirement Years: Find Joy, Excitement, and Purpose After You Retire (self-help): Not a one-size-fits-all approach, this self-help book for retirees, those soon to retire, baby boomers, and seniors offers an individualized, detailed guide to assist readers in discovering activities and pursuits in this new stage of their lives called retirement, based on their own likes and comfort level. I learned the secret the hard way transitioning from retired probation officer to actress, author, public speaker, and blogger. Audience members at my lectures on senior reinvention requested a book on the subject. This is the result, and it contains the content of those talks and six years of posts from this blog. CLICK here TO PURCHASE FROM AMAZON.COM.
Adventures with Dad: A Father and Daughter’s Journey Through a Senior Acting Class (memoir): After retiring at age 60 from my 37-year career as a probation officer, I mistakenly enrolled in an acting class for seniors. A few weeks later, my mother died, and I invited my grieving, 85-year-old father to come to class with me. This is the true story of our magical journey attending that class together for three years, bonding more than ever. I wrote the comedy scenes we performed onstage twice a year in the acting class showcases, and all six scenes are included in the book. I eventually transitioned into the world of professional acting. As my fledgling, second career started going uphill, my dad’s health started going downhill. I would recount to him each of my new experiences while I sat beside his bed at the nursing home where he resided in his final years. CLICK here TO PURCHASE FROM AMAZON.COM.
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Reinventing Yourself in Your Retirement Years 