This blog is written by Lee Gale Gruen to help retirees, those soon to retire, baby boomers, and seniors reinvent themselves in this new stage of their lives called retirement. Her blog, public lecture, and new self-help book on senior reinvention are titled: Reinventing Yourself in Your Retirement Years: Find Joy Excitement, and Purpose After You Retire. Her memoir is: Adventures with Dad: A Father and Daughter’s Journey Through a Senior Acting Class. Books descriptions follow her blog below. Both books are available at Amazon.com by clicking here and here. Her website is: LeeGaleGruen.com
Now, on to my blog:
Are you a standing out or a blending in kind of gal/guy? These two types of personalities are found near opposite ends of a continuum, and all people fit in somewhere along that line. The extremes are akin to extrovert versus introvert but not quite to the extent that those labels bring to mind.
A standing out person might be more chatty, exuberant, flashy, etc. A blending in person might be more introspective, subtle, reserved, and the like. One is not better than the other, necessarily. They both have their pros and cons.
Personality types are evident in very young children. It seems to be something that one is born with. Then, a little environmental influence along the maturation process is added to the basic recipe, and the whole mixture molds that human to establish his/her personality. That is what usually determines where you fall on the personality scale when you finally reach adulthood.
A standing out kind of person might attract more attention to themselves, but that attention could be either positive or negative. A blending in type of person might harbor envy of the standing-outers who usually get the lion’s share of attention. Of course, standing-outers might be jealous of the blending-iners who may not get the blame as often.
Standing out can be exhausting while blending in might seem to be less taxing and energy draining. However, blending-iners might suffer more internal turmoil from the lack of recognition they think they deserve.
You probably can’t change your innate personality, but you may be able to modify it if you’re willing to put in the effort required to do so. The trick to contentment, however, is to accept your own personality type and make peace with it.
Regardless, of which personality you tend to favor, there are careers, activities, companions, and rewards available to suit your type. Seek them out and take advantage of them at your own comfort level. Trial and error will help you find your particular niche.
Reinventing Yourself in Your Retirement Years: Find Joy, Excitement, and Purpose After You Retire (self-help): Not a one-size-fits-all approach, this self-help book for retirees, those soon to retire, baby boomers, and seniors offers an individualized, detailed guide to assist readers in discovering activities and pursuits in this new stage of their lives called retirement, based on their own likes and comfort level. I learned the secret the hard way transitioning from retired probation officer to actress, author, public speaker, and blogger. Audience members at my lectures on senior reinvention requested a book on the subject. This is the result, and it contains the content of those talks and six years of posts from this blog. CLICK here TO PURCHASE FROM AMAZON.COM.
Adventures with Dad: A Father and Daughter’s Journey Through a Senior Acting Class (memoir): After retiring at age 60 from my 37-year career as a probation officer, I mistakenly enrolled in an acting class for seniors. A few weeks later, my mother died, and I invited my grieving, 85-year-old father to come to class with me. This is the true story of our magical journey attending that class together for three years, bonding more than ever. I wrote the comedy scenes we performed onstage twice a year in the acting class showcases, and all six scenes are included in the book. I eventually transitioned into the world of professional acting. As my fledgling, second career started going uphill, my dad’s health started going downhill. I would recount to him each of my new experiences while I sat beside his bed at the nursing home where he resided in his final years. CLICK here TO PURCHASE FROM AMAZON.COM.
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Please forward my blog in its entirety to anyone who might be interested, and post it on your Facebook, Twitter and other social media accounts. To reprint any material, contact me for permission at: gowergulch@yahoo.com. If you want to be automatically notified when I post a new blog, click on the “Follow” button in the upper right corner of this page and fill in the information. To read my other blog posts, scroll down on this page or click on “Recent Posts” or “Archives” under the Follow button. To opt out of receiving this blog, contact me at the aforementioned email address, let me know, and I’ll remove you from the list.
This blog is written by Lee Gale Gruen to help retirees, those soon to retire, baby boomers, and seniors reinvent themselves in this new stage of their lives called retirement. Her blog, public lecture, and new self-help book on senior reinvention are titled: Reinventing Yourself in Your Retirement Years: Find Joy Excitement, and Purpose After You Retire. Her memoir is: Adventures with Dad: A Father and Daughter’s Journey Through a Senior Acting Class. Books descriptions follow her blog below. Both books are available at Amazon.com by clicking here and here. Her website is: LeeGaleGruen.com
Now, on to my blog:
I used to have a casual friend who I usually encountered in a group situation. Occasionally, we spoke on the phone, most often to discuss an upcoming get-together of our mutual friends. I remember when I would call her, she was often “so busy.” Her frequent reply to my opening “Hi, how are you?” was, “Oh, hi. I can give you five minutes.”
How benevolent of her to grant me five minutes of her valuable time. However, what I got out of her generosity was that I no longer cared to call her. She was condescending, and obviously, I was rarely high enough on her list of priorities to warrant more than five minutes allotted to me.
I had a different friend who is, also, now a former friend. She started associating with another crowd, and I hadn’t talked to her for a while. One day, I was thinking about her, so I called her just to chat. After my opening “Hi, how are you?” her response after the obligatory “fine” was, “What did you call about?” What I called about was not a specific matter but just for some connection. She made me feel foolish with her confrontational question, as though it were a business matter and how she could be most efficient in hurrying it along. I think you can pretty much guess our future relationship. Neither of us called the other again.
I’m not interested in friends like that. Let the first aforementioned person give her valuable five minutes to someone else. Let the second not have my friendship. I, on the other hand, will spend my time and energy with those who appreciate me and vice versa.
Do you have such a situation in your life; maybe the same words are not used, but it’s the same idea? You know that guy/gal who always leaves you feeling a little wonky after finishing your contact with them? Something is not quite right, but you can’t figure out what it is. If so, spend a little time analyzing why that person is so off-putting. If, on the other hand, you are the off-putter, be aware of why your friends keep melting away.
There’s no need for anyone to continue batting their head against the proverbial wall. Simply walk away from involvement with people who make you feel unworthy. I know that’s not always easy. It might be someone close such as a family member or one who is part of a larger group of friends. Nevertheless, there’s no need for you to feel demeaned each time you have an interaction with them. Find others who make you feel good about yourself and are able and willing to give you more than just five minutes.
Reinventing Yourself in Your Retirement Years: Find Joy, Excitement, and Purpose After You Retire (self-help): Not a one-size-fits-all approach, this self-help book for retirees, those soon to retire, baby boomers, and seniors offers an individualized, detailed guide to assist readers in discovering activities and pursuits in this new stage of their lives called retirement, based on their own likes and comfort level. I learned the secret the hard way transitioning from retired probation officer to actress, author, public speaker, and blogger. Audience members at my lectures on senior reinvention requested a book on the subject. This is the result, and it contains the content of those talks and six years of posts from this blog. CLICK here TO PURCHASE FROM AMAZON.COM.
Adventures with Dad: A Father and Daughter’s Journey Through a Senior Acting Class (memoir): After retiring at age 60 from my 37-year career as a probation officer, I mistakenly enrolled in an acting class for seniors. A few weeks later, my mother died, and I invited my grieving, 85-year-old father to come to class with me. This is the true story of our magical journey attending that class together for three years, bonding more than ever. I wrote the comedy scenes we performed onstage twice a year in the acting class showcases, and all six scenes are included in the book. I eventually transitioned into the world of professional acting. As my fledgling, second career started going uphill, my dad’s health started going downhill. I would recount to him each of my new experiences while I sat beside his bed at the nursing home where he resided in his final years. CLICK here TO PURCHASE FROM AMAZON.COM.
***
Please forward my blog in its entirety to anyone who might be interested, and post it on your Facebook, Twitter and other social media accounts. To reprint any material, contact me for permission at: gowergulch@yahoo.com. If you want to be automatically notified when I post a new blog, click on the “Follow” button in the upper right corner of this page and fill in the information. To read my other blog posts, scroll down on this page or click on “Recent Posts” or “Archives” under the Follow button. To opt out of receiving this blog, contact me at the aforementioned email address, let me know, and I’ll remove you from the list.
This blog is written by Lee Gale Gruen to help retirees, those soon to retire, baby boomers, and seniors reinvent themselves in this new stage of their lives called retirement. Her blog, public lecture, and new self-help book on senior reinvention are titled: Reinventing Yourself in Your Retirement Years: Find Joy Excitement, and Purpose After You Retire. Her memoir is: Adventures with Dad: A Father and Daughter’s Journey Through a Senior Acting Class. Books descriptions follow her blog below. Both books are available at Amazon.com by clicking here and here. Her website is: LeeGaleGruen.com
Now, on to my blog:
Everyone has an angle. No, I’m not talking about the 90 degree type or its gradients. I mean an angle in the sense of one’s agenda. It is a selfish manipulation of a situation in order to maximize it for one’s own benefit. That is not a good thing or a bad thing. It is simply human nature–or actually animal nature. We must behave that way in order to insure our own survival.
However, some people carry it to an extreme. They go far beyond mere survival. Their “angle” is to drive as much of the communal resources toward themselves as they can, often to the detriment of the other members. That’s when an angle begins swinging from neutral toward the far end of the pendulum’s arc.
We see that a lot these days. For example, there is way too much wealth concentrated in the hands of way too few. That leaves way too many without the ability to satisfy even their basic needs.
Some will say that those unfortunate folks were simply not smart enough, not sharp enough, not swift enough, not lucky enough, not resourceful enough, not…not…not. That may be so, but are those reasons to justify why smarties, sharpies, swifties, et al should have far more than they will ever be able to use in their lifetime or their children’s lifetimes or their grandchildren’s lifetimes or…or…or? Even with spending it as fast as they can on lavish goods and projects such as vanity rocket ships, they still can’t seem to get rid of their money. The structure of their businesses and investments along with the laws and politics that accompany them add more wealth to fill any gap in their financial portfolios that their expenditures create.
These are questions that our society has grappled with historically and is currently grappling with. How long do we let this situation continue? Is it until we are not only witnessing homeless encampments on the side of our local roads, but when we are actually stepping around the impoverished as we walk down the sidewalks that abut those roads or honk impatiently at them as we are trying to pull our cars out of the driveway. How long do we wait?
Of course, our ever-ready police departments will clear away such intruders into our manicured neighborhoods. That works fine when there are one or two or ten. But, what about when there are several dozen, several hundred, several…? How long do we wait?
Yes, I know–in order to incentivize a person to be creative and innovative, some type of reward is usually required, and that reward is most often monetary along with its resultant Three-Ps: power, privilege, and prestige. Still…
Reinventing Yourself in Your Retirement Years: Find Joy, Excitement, and Purpose After You Retire (self-help): Not a one-size-fits-all approach, this self-help book for retirees, those soon to retire, baby boomers, and seniors offers an individualized, detailed guide to assist readers in discovering activities and pursuits in this new stage of their lives called retirement, based on their own likes and comfort level. I learned the secret the hard way transitioning from retired probation officer to actress, author, public speaker, and blogger. Audience members at my lectures on senior reinvention requested a book on the subject. This is the result, and it contains the content of those talks and six years of posts from this blog. CLICK here TO PURCHASE FROM AMAZON.COM.
Adventures with Dad: A Father and Daughter’s Journey Through a Senior Acting Class (memoir): After retiring at age 60 from my 37-year career as a probation officer, I mistakenly enrolled in an acting class for seniors. A few weeks later, my mother died, and I invited my grieving, 85-year-old father to come to class with me. This is the true story of our magical journey attending that class together for three years, bonding more than ever. I wrote the comedy scenes we performed onstage twice a year in the acting class showcases, and all six scenes are included in the book. I eventually transitioned into the world of professional acting. As my fledgling, second career started going uphill, my dad’s health started going downhill. I would recount to him each of my new experiences while I sat beside his bed at the nursing home where he resided in his final years. CLICK here TO PURCHASE FROM AMAZON.COM.
***
Please forward my blog in its entirety to anyone who might be interested, and post it on your Facebook, Twitter and other social media accounts. To reprint any material, contact me for permission at: gowergulch@yahoo.com. If you want to be automatically notified when I post a new blog, click on the “Follow” button in the upper right corner of this page and fill in the information. To read my other blog posts, scroll down on this page or click on “Recent Posts” or “Archives” under the Follow button. To opt out of receiving this blog, contact me at the aforementioned email address, let me know, and I’ll remove you from the list.
This blog is written by Lee Gale Gruen to help retirees, those soon to retire, baby boomers, and seniors reinvent themselves in this new stage of their lives called retirement. Her blog, public lecture, and new self-help book on senior reinvention are titled: Reinventing Yourself in Your Retirement Years: Find Joy Excitement, and Purpose After You Retire. Her memoir is: Adventures with Dad: A Father and Daughter’s Journey Through a Senior Acting Class. Books descriptions follow her blog below. Both books are available at Amazon.com by clicking here and here. Her website is: LeeGaleGruen.com
Now, on to my blog:
We are all hiding some parts of ourselves from the light of day. They are those parts we don’t want to reveal to others lest they disapprove, judge, and deem us unworthy or undesirable. Yes, everyone has those hidden aspects no matter how attractive, rich, personable, or privileged they might be.
We have learned along the way what is socially acceptable and what is not. We skillfully hide our not-so-attractive parts with a magician’s sleight-of-hand. We keep talking constantly so as to deflect our audience from potentially discovering our flaws. We toss out glib remarks to detour others from learning our secrets. We withhold personal details to keep them from gaining an upper hand.
The downside is that our hypervigilance becomes exhausting and a time suck. Juggling balls is no fun. When do we get to “let our hair down” and be our authentic self?
For some, the answer is never. However, for many others as they age, they begin to realize that these great secrets they’ve spent so much time and energy hiding are not the big deals that they always thought they were. The reality is that most people are spending their attention and efforts on their own issues to care much about yours.
What I’m suggesting is to stop hiding your imperfections. I know it’s a scary thought and a complete about face from your decades old modus operandi. But, think of the upside. Your life may become so much less stressful–worrisome. (I’ve written on this topic before. Click here to read my blog of 6-26-18: “The Big Reveal” and here to read my blog of 4-29-19: “Hiding.”)
You don’t have to unmask everything at once. Try it in baby steps. Expose just one or a few of your vulnerabilities, and see how that goes. Then, assess the outcome. Have you become the pariah of your community or did people really not care? If you survived that first attempt, try another one. You may not need to let it all hang out, but at least start taking off some of your makeup and showing others what you really look like underneath. All you have to gain is a greater comfort level in your life.
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BOOKS BY:LEE GALE GRUEN
Reinventing Yourself in Your Retirement Years: Find Joy, Excitement, and Purpose After You Retire (self-help): Not a one-size-fits-all approach, this self-help book for retirees, those soon to retire, baby boomers, and seniors offers an individualized, detailed guide to assist readers in discovering activities and pursuits in this new stage of their lives called retirement, based on their own likes and comfort level. I learned the secret the hard way transitioning from retired probation officer to actress, author, public speaker, and blogger. Audience members at my lectures on senior reinvention requested a book on the subject. This is the result, and it contains the content of those talks and six years of posts from this blog. CLICK here TO PURCHASE FROM AMAZON.COM.
Adventures with Dad: A Father and Daughter’s Journey Through a Senior Acting Class (memoir): After retiring at age 60 from my 37-year career as a probation officer, I mistakenly enrolled in an acting class for seniors. A few weeks later, my mother died, and I invited my grieving, 85-year-old father to come to class with me. This is the true story of our magical journey attending that class together for three years, bonding more than ever. I wrote the comedy scenes we performed onstage twice a year in the acting class showcases, and all six scenes are included in the book. I eventually transitioned into the world of professional acting. As my fledgling, second career started going uphill, my dad’s health started going downhill. I would recount to him each of my new experiences while I sat beside his bed at the nursing home where he resided in his final years. CLICK here TO PURCHASE FROM AMAZON.COM.
***
Please forward my blog in its entirety to anyone who might be interested, and post it on your Facebook, Twitter and other social media accounts. To reprint any material, contact me for permission at: gowergulch@yahoo.com. If you want to be automatically notified when I post a new blog, click on the “Follow” button in the upper right corner of this page and fill in the information. To read my other blog posts, scroll down on this page or click on “Recent Posts” or “Archives” under the Follow button. To opt out of receiving this blog, contact me at the aforementioned email address, let me know, and I’ll remove you from the list.
Reinventing Yourself in Your Retirement Years 